I sent it

"I've been wanting to tell you something for... oh I dunno. Over a decade?

(It's my birthday, you know, and I'm feeling sentimental. Go figure.)

You already know. I know you do. Just... I love you. Always have, and always will. Maybe not romantically, maybe not anything any more than at a distance, maybe only when songs from 1995 come on the radio, maybe only when I see popcorn ceilings and remember sanding yours with you and Amy, maybe just the random what-if and the little smile that comes up when I see a message from you on my birthday.

When you showed up in town last autumn, I didn't dare admit it, not to myself, let alone anyone else, but seeing you made me so very happy. I held my breath when you came in the room and (please don't tell) cried when you left.

Let's just say I wish I could have a coffee with you anytime I wanted. One day, a long time from now, I'd very much like it if the people we are now (and will become) could be friends again like we were then... taking time for granted, loving without knowing, knowing without feeling, not even realizing how innocent we were, nor how much life lie ahead, nor just how valuable those few short experiences were.

Until then, just know that someone, without contention, sans any selfishness or motive, loves you and wants you to be the very best person you can be -- happy, healthy, loved and in love, hopeful and content, joyous and awe-struck.

Promise.

May the world be your oyster and your soul be complete.

Always,

(alfie)"